Saturday, January 29, 2011

Green is synonymous with cool, right?


Stop it.  This post is not about marijuana.  I’m actually talking about the color green.  You must admit there’s something about the color green.  I believe it’s one of the most androgynous colors on the rainbow, whether it’s as soft as mint green or as bold as hunter… Geez (I just had a spicy moment over here).  It’s beautiful.  But let’s speak practically.  This article isn’t about beauty; it’s about the study of fictional characters who “swagged” it out with green as their personal strong safety.

Let us investigate…

Doug Funnie



Doug was probably one of the coolest kids known to man in the nineties.  He triumphantly and cleverly conquered bullies like Roger all while rocking a green sweater vest.  Impressive.  Sweater vests aren’t intimidating neither are they “sexy” but he was liked by all.  And be honest, the television audience loved Doug as well.

“Hey Arnold"


I love and hate that Arnold never released his last name (those damn writers).  I think I actually love it more than hate it.  I’m “green” with envy… I wish I could be so amazingly mysterious yet friendly.  It’s a talent.  Anyway, Arnold rocked not only a “football head”, but also a green sweater atop a red flannel shirt.  Genius.  Arnold had people testing him all the time (Helga and Harold) and still managed to be the “coolest” kid in NY. I see a similarity here. 

Fact: Green is often times associated with jealousy and envy.  That I won’t argue, but according to Arnold and Doug’s aesthetic, when the color green is threaded it takes on a new face.

The point, there’s a correlation between swag and green knitwear.  It took me years to figure it out, but now I know what the cool, nice kids are wearing.  It begins with green and ends with knitwear. 

Roll call: Doug Funnie. Check.  Arnold (No last name).  Check.  Dustin Gavin.  Check.  Ok, it’s official.  The cool kids are wearing green!


Thursday, January 27, 2011

Whatever, I’m getting cheese fries!


It’s 2011.  It’s a new year, and whether you admit it or not looking great is a concern of yours.  This idea of achieving an ideal body weight is ingrained in our minds on every magazine cover, movie poster, painting, article, tagline, catch-phrase…. I digress.  The point, most of us want to look great yet don’t understand the process of losing weight nor how to develop and individual, proper diet.

Let’s look at the facts..

In Mean Girls, Regina George (Rachel McAdams) delivers an epic line: “Whatever, I’m getting cheese fries”, after not completely understanding the ratio of fats-to-calories.


In The Devil Wears Prada, Emily (Emily Blunt) describes her dietary plan to Andy Sachs (Anne Hathaway) and states: “I’m on this new diet.  Well, I don’t eat anything and when I feel like I’m about to faint I eat a cube of cheese.”

Both women look amazing in these films and both turn to cheese within their dietary plans.  I decided there must be a correlation to looking great and eating cheese.

Fact: Cheese calories are often high due to their high fat content.  But why bother with the facts.  Sometimes the concrete evidence MUST be ignored. Mean Girls and The Devil Wears Prada both displayed hott girls with a cheese diet.  So I’m stocked and ready with plenty of cheese on deck.  No apples and oranges for me because I for one need to get my beach body ready.  In the words of Regina George, “Whatever, I’m getting cheese fries!”